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  • Writer's pictureriesaminakan

Happy Holidays! Yeah right...

The holidays are coming up but the holidays are not such a happy time for a lot of people. In fact, you would be surprised to know that the holidays are difficult for most people. Let’s be honest. We look at all the ‘perfect’ families on social media and often we compare our lives with ‘them’ and feel less than. Well, I’m here to de-mystify everyone’s social mask with reality. I have spent 15 years witnessing everyone’s reality and I can assure you that we are all struggling in this human experience. No one has a perfect life. I work with people who appear to be perfect and have these awesome lives and that’s not the reality behind closed doors. Having said that, holidays can be a time of reflection that can be very complicated. I work with people that need to work a lot in being prepared to be around their family without getting emotionally hijacked. Or a client who doesn’t have any family or friends to be with and the holidays remind them of that. Or people who have lost a loved one. There’s always a sadness colored into holidays. People who are divorced and mourn the family they planned to have. Some are suffering with illness and don’t know if this is their last holiday with their family. The bottom line is that for most people the holidays are complicated. I want to reach out to everyone who thinks that they are the only one experiencing this sadness to know you not the only one. I would love to create a place where the veils of our social masks are down and we start really connecting and supporting each other. Maybe you guys will have suggestions. Let me know. Now, I didn’t write this to be negative Nelly. My intention is to share with everyone the fact that images are not real. You have more in common with people than you think. We need each other and to be real about ourselves and stop comparing our lives to something that doesn’t exist. I believe what makes self-help groups such as AA so powerful is because people are getting together from all walks of life and stopping with the bullshit and getting real and connecting with each other. Then the energy shifts and healing space is created because you are part of something bigger than you and your problems become smaller. So, my hope for anyone reading this realizes that you have company. It’s okay not to be ‘happy’ during the holidays. I do hope that you can concentrate on what you have and not what you don’t. Honestly, there isn’t anyone who can say there is nothing to be grateful for. Sometimes you have to dig deep. I relate. However, when you really try, you’d be amazed at how much we do have. So, allow yourself to feel all of your feelings this holiday. Honor your feelings and try to make the most of it. They are legitimate and valid and so are you! Actually, you are more than that! You are imperfectly, beautifully, uniquely you! Be that! In fact, that can be your present to everyone! When you are YOU, your light shines and that helps everyone!

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